First the offense... defense after the jump... but its typical parity. Look... James Laurinaitis and Malcolm Kelly are great individual players, but how much of Ohio State's defensive stats come from plundering nearby elfin villages?

And here we thought we did a pretty decent job producing some college football videos. But when you leave it to the pros at Mob Scene you get something especially sweet.

Do yourself a favor and get all of the production value by watching the higher quality version on You Tube.

FYI for Californians: a Buckeye is a nut (and Ohio State's mascot).

[Thanks Garrett]

The move he puts on safety Jermaine Phillips (#23) is nasty.

Reggie, Reggie Reggie... Saints take lead again [The Times-Picayune]

Click the continued button to watch the creation of this monument... as well as alternate views... all set to "FanFare-TributeToTroy." Outstanding.

[Thanks Matt G]

***EDITOR'S NOTE*** The fifth and final person to answer correctly to what Joe needs was Adam Rose. The correct answer was money. If you look closely at the first shot, Joe has "I need $" scrawled on his black eye strips.

John Phillips on Eric Clapton and Pete Townsend bird dogging the early Jimi Hendrix scene.

"The incredible thing was... you could watch him like a hawk but you could not figure out how he did it."

After watching this over and over again, we can still not figure out Joe McKnight.

Bruce Feldman wrote in his book Meat Market:

"[It's] as if he is on ice skates, with everyone else slogging around in overshoes. None of the defenders could get a hand on him."

For the first five studious observers to email what Joe McKnight needs (HINT: It's very literal), we are giving away tickets for FREE BRANDERS BBQ at the Coliseum on gameday against Ohio State.

Email your answers to scoop@trojanwire.com after watching the video below.

Thanks to the folks at the M Zone for bringing this to our attention.

Well not really.

But the annex of the Phi Delta Theta chapter at USC was a testament to squalor, and living in it; partying there was unlike any other and doubtful to be replicated any time soon.

(No way does a fire marshal or state health official ever let students live in a condemned building with a hallway lined in broken glass again.)

Not the funniest video we've ever seen, but we'll always shill for Will.

As the SportzAssassin points out -- who knows what he was ranting about before they came back from the break. Maybe it was "(everyone talks trash, but I don't believe in) USC thugs, man." But something tells us that's not the case, and that Steve Beuerlein is one of the minority out there (consisting primarily of UCLA, Notre Dame and ASU fans) that firmly agreed with the 15-yard penalty that Sedrick Ellis received on Saturday night.

And for that, Mr. Beuerlein receives our Charlie Weis "Douche of the Week" award. Kudos to you, Steve. You're simply the best.

Steve Beuerlein Is Not A Fan Of USC [Awful Announcing]
CBS Analyst Steve Beuerlein Utters 'USC Thugs, Man' On Air [FanHouse]

Ouch.

If you missed it, here's the aforementioned video from the "Not Thankful for Pac-10 Officiating" segment. Fifteen yards for one second of the flex?! This is absolute bullshit. It wasn't in your face, it wasn't excessive. Charles Barkley would be a better ref than these assholes.

If he beats Arizona, UCLA and Oregon State, he would have our vote. But as good as Oregon is, we just don't see that happening.

USC 2007 Homecoming Map [usc.edu]