The Sark Virus

Dictionary: vac·cine (văk-sēn', văk'sēn'), n. A preparation of a weakened or killed pathogen, such as a bacterium or virus, or of a portion of the pathogen's structure that upon administration stimulates antibody production or cellular immunity against the pathogen but is incapable of causing severe infection.

Paragon commented below on Chip Kelly's visits with Jon Gruden and their likely collaboration on a scheme to defeat USC's Tampa 2 defense. While there is little doubt that Kelly learned much from Gruden, in football there is no substitute for practice followed by live experience and further practice to help you perfect your scheme. A perfect scheme can give a team "immunity" against an adversary.

When Steve Sarkisian and Nick Holt moved to the University of Washington they installed offensive and defensive systems virtually identical those at USC. Sark and Holt were able to create a scheme to defeat USC on Sept. 19th thanks to their intimate knowledge of every phase of USC's playbook. That game produced a wealth of information for all of USC's future opponents, but in addition a total of 6 of USC's adversaries have or will have had the opportunity to practice against USC by playing a "weakened pathogen" or vaccine known as the Sark Virus of Washington.The Sark Virus vaccine contains attenuated USC offensive and defensive structures (or antigens) that can produce strong or even absolute immunity against USC infection.

If only the CDC could be this efficient

The following table shows that Stanford, Notre Dame, Arizona, Arizona State, Oregon, and UCLA all get Sark Virus immunization this year before playing USC:

9/25/09	Washington at Stanford
10/03/09	Washington at Notre Dame
10/10/09	Arizona at Washington
10/17/09	Washington at Arizona State	USC at Notre Dame
10/24/09	Oregon at Washington*
10/31/09		USC at Oregon
11/07/09	Washington at UCLA	USC at Arizona State
11/14/09		Stanford at USC
11/28/09		UCLA at USC
12/05/09		Arizona at USC

*Oregon was vaccinated exactly one week before facing USC

Predictable Results?

The Oregon and Washington debacles show the extreme value of a perfectly crafted gameplan and live experience. In retrospect, this makes USC's victory at Notre Dame seem a little bit more remarkable.

Everyone has heard of "scheduling for success," but this years schedule, front loaded with tough road games and with opponents that are fully informed and extensively practiced against USC's methods is a schedule for misery. Difficult times may lay ahead against ASU, Stanford, Arizona and perhaps even lowly UCLA unless USC's coaches are able to develop new weapons or "antigens" that will defeat fully developed "antibodies."

The time for them to pine for the past when USC doesn't live up to expectations. We hear it constantly from the insufferable Scott Wolf. We recently heard it from the insufferable Matt Hayes. And now Chris Dufresne has joined the chorus (circus?). It really is a spectacle to watch, a supposed impartial press he can seem to get over the fact that the two big egos in the room were never going to last.

This week Dufresne opens up the mailbag...it just so happens that all of the answered mail seemed to always want to discuss Norm Chow or Pete Carroll's deficiency with running the offense. Of course Dufresne led with the  Chowista's to set the tone for effect.

My first response was Really? No Kidding?

There was no second response because I wasn't really shocked at all.

Here is a sample...

Question: Do you think Norm Chow was chuckling to himself at some point on Sunday? You know, we never see people wide open with regularity at USC since Norm departed. The art of the mismatch has left the building.

Patrick K. Gallagher

Long Beach

Answer: Norm isn't that kind of guy, but if it was me, I'd be Chuckles the Clown.

What's playing out in Los Angeles right now is fascinating. USC has not won a national title since Chow left the staff after the 2004 season, and we know why he left.

Pete Carroll had two young whiz kids on his staff, Steve Sarkisian and Lane Kiffin, who were getting antsy for larger roles as outside job offers were coming in.

So Carroll took Chow to lunch in the South Bay and said he wanted to promote him to assistant head coach.

Hey, that's terrific! Except, he was going to take away play-calling duties -- the thing Chow does best -- and make the kids co-coordinators.

Next thing you knew Norm was in Nashville.

For what it's worth, now back in town, Chow called a nice game Saturday as he nursed backup quarterback Kevin Craft to UCLA's victory against Kansas State.

Also, in the critical moments of this year's Tennessee game, Chow called a quarterback sneak for Kevin Prince on third down with UCLA holding a six-point lead pinned against its own end zone.

Rick Neuheisel overruled Chow and ordered the bootleg play that ended up getting Prince's jaw broken in two places.

Hindsight is always perfect, but Rick should have listened to Norm.

Q: USC's problems Saturday were symptoms of very poor hiring decisions by Pete Carroll that began after Chow was pushed out. . . . As it is, the most successful period of the Carroll legacy is the "Chow Era." Ironic, isn't it?

Steve Rodriguez

A: I don't know if it's ironic or interesting. I always get that mixed up.

These sorts of questions, of course, is what some of the USC fan base thinks...those who can let go of the past. Those who constantly dream of what if's. Those who think Norm Chow would have cured all the ills of USC's bad performances the last few years.

I don't claim to be a football expert but digging up the numbers on some of USC's past bed wettings point to some things that Chow could have had very little to do with...lets come back to that later.

Lets pick the one game that gives the fan base the most angst...the one game that would have cemented Pete Carroll's legacy forever...Texas. If USC wins that game Chow was as good as gone, Chow would have leveraged that into a head coaching job.. Sure the voices in the wilderness would have said that there was nothing more that Chow had to prove that the time was right for him to go to stake his own claim. IF everything else stayed the same there would still be in the some out in the wilderness claiming that PC had not won anything without Norm Chow.

We are where we are...

There are some that continue to whine and cry about Chow's departure claiming it all because of Sarkisian and Kiffin. Whatever...Chow has some mud on his shoes here too...like trying to woo Mark Sanchez away from USC when he thought he had the 'furd job locked up. Say what you want about Sark or Kiff running Chow out there isn't one specific reason that led to Chow leaving...it was a little bit of everything. People seem to forget (or miss) that BOTH Pete Carroll and Norm Chow have big egos so there is no guarantee that Chow would have lasted much longer than 2005.

This whole situation is symbiotic...Pete Carroll went out and got the talent and PC, Ed O and Chow (with others) worked together to get it firing on all cylinders. Chow has never done it on his own. He always needed someone to go out and get his players. He is not a recruiter. Nothing wrong with that but lets not make the man something more than he really is...

So lets look at those game I mentioned.

The MNC against Texas - USC scores 38 points and gains over 500 yards. If not for a patchwork defense that was put together with spit and toilet paper because of youth and injuries I am not seeing how much more Chow would have or could have done. Yes, there will be those that say that not having Bush in the game on 4th and 2 was a critical miscue but SC ran that play all night with success. Texas knew it was coming, SC knew Texas knew and the Texas defense held, case closed. We could dissect that until the end of time...

Against Oregon St. 2006 - USC scores 31 points and gains almost 500 yards...it was the 4 turnovers and a punt return for a TD that sunk USC that day...Not sure how Chow being in the booth changes that.

Against ucla 2006 -  Last time I checked Norm Chow didn't coach the O line and that game saw Booty on his back a lot in that game. If the QB doesn't have any protection you might as well throw the play book in the trash.

Against Stanford 2007 - USC scores 23 points but gains over 450 yards. You could make the argument that SC could have made better use of its time in the redzone but 5 turnovers and the USC defense allowing a conversion on 4th and 20 is what killed them that fateful night.

Against Oregon St. 2008 - That was a complete defensive debacle in the first half. SC never recovered...I am not sure that Chow knows anything about defense in regards to coaching it.

As good as Chow is, I am not sure he would have addressed some or any of those issues listed above...I simply refuse to think that Norm Chow would have cured all of SC's ills in those games. I can understand and accept some of the criticism that has been heaped on Pete Carroll for letting his ego get in the way of how this team is perceived to be run. I can see where some will criticize some of his coaching moves as OJT for some who have come and gone from the staff but that is a different issue. The issue I am addressing is Norm Chow.

Everyone wants to point to the fact that Pete Carroll has won nothing since Norm Chow left...

I will take the flip side to that coin, what has Norm Chow won or accomplished since he left Pete Carroll and USC?

Not Much...

Until I actually see a crystal ball in the Morgan Center I am not convinced that ucla will ever be a national contender...I mean one MNC (split) in 50 years does not make you a national power house. I don't care who the HC or the OC is. There are already rumblings that Chow and Slick Rick are having some clashes...not surprising. When Chow took the job across town my 3-year old could have pointed out that sooner or later there would be tensions between the two. Slick Rick's ego is as big as Pete Carroll's...we already know Chow has a big ego.

Only time will tell...but I have moved on.

Don't go into hibernation just yet; there are positives to be taken away from this game shown in the highlights.

Joe McKnight rushed for 100 yards on 11 carries, upping his current season total rush yards to 305. Could he be the first Trojan since Reggie Bush to rush for over 1000 yards in a season?

The offense struggled with the passing game, but there were some great runs by Stanley Havili, Stafon Johnson, and Allen Bradford.

USC's young defense did a great job containing Jake Locker and holding the Huskies to 16 points. If only the offense would have scored another touchdown or two. Sophomore Jurrell Casey and redshirt freshman Nick Perry set up camp in the Huskies' backfield.

1. Kelly green or blue: Chip Kelly makes his debut as Oregon's head coach at Boise State in a matchup of ranked teams on ESPN. If the Ducks look well-prepared and poised and -- most important -- win, the majority of questions about whether Kelly was ready to take over for Mike Bellotti will go away. If they are sloppy and lose, well, Kelly will experience his first heat since making a huge splash as the offensive coordinator in 2007.
2. Can Sarkisian's Huskies compete? Some folks have been, curiously, touting Washington's capability to upset visiting LSU. Hmm. While there's a strong sense that the Huskies, particularly with the return of a healthy Jake Locker at quarterback, are significantly better than their 0-12 record from 2008 would indicate, being significantly better than winless means only a couple of wins, not an upset of an SEC superpower. The big picture matters here, even more than how Locker looks as a pro-style quarterback: Will the Huskies fight and claw for four quarters and keep this one respectable?
3. Best for first: Perhaps California running back Jahvid Best's worst memory from 2008 was his performance at Maryland. Not only did he have only 25 yards on 10 carries, he also got smashed on a pass play and threw up while the TV cameras were on him. Well, the Terrapins are coming to Memorial Stadium with a rebuilding defense, and Best is supposed to be the West Coast's leading Heisman Trophy candidate. Good time for him to break out a few highlight-reel runs so his post-game film and YouTube clips are better this time.
4. Can Wulff's Cougars compete? Much like its hated cross-state rivals, Washington State is trying to return to the realm of respectability after a dismal 2-11 finish last season, which included a 58-0 pasting at Stanford. While the Cougars will tell you they are going for the upset, the real mission here is to keep the score respectable and fight for four quarters. If the Cardinal again run over the Cougars -- this time in front of a Martin Stadium crowd -- the heat might turn up on Wulff, whether that is fair or not.
5. Says Barkley, "Hello world!" While the game might not be terribly thrilling, USC's matchup with San Jose State will be the debut of super-frosh quarterback Matt Barkley, who takes over the premier position in college football as an 18-year-old. If Barkley is lights-out, then Heisman talk will begin and the hype before the Trojans visit Ohio State will be epic. If Barkley struggles, then the hand-wringing and second-guessing will begin and the hype before the Trojans visit Ohio State will be epic.
6. Who the heck is Arizona's quarterback? Perhaps Arizona coach Mike Stoops will send out a quarterback against Central Michigan with a mask on and a "?" for his number. While most signs point to Matt Scott getting the start and Nick Foles seeing some action, Stoops has refused to reveal who will take the first snap. His most definitive statement is both will play. Maybe. The Chippewas are not a team to take lightly, so the hope is whoever is at quarterback will capably lead the offense. The guess here is Stoops and offensive coordinator Sonny Dykes would like to have a true starter before the trip to Iowa on Sept. 19.
7. Prince or pauper on offense? UCLA's redshirt freshman quarterback Kevin Prince makes his debut against San Diego State -- L.A. fires permitting -- and Bruins fans are hoping last year's horrible offensive showing will be rendered a distant memory as Prince and a youthful offensive line dominate the action. The reality figures to fall short of that as Prince likely will only be as good as his line, which may struggle with three first-time starters going against a peculiar 3-3-5 scheme. If the Bruins can't block the Aztecs, then it won't have much hope against Pac-10 defenses.
8. Secondary test: Portland State won't beat Oregon State, but its high-flying passing attack might test the Beavers' rebuilt secondary. At least a little. In any event, an FCS foe means the Beavers will start 1-0, which is 100 percent better than 2008.
9. Suspended sentence: Arizona State will be missing six or seven suspended players -- coach Dennis Erickson wouldn't be specific -- against Idaho State. And there are injury issues. A good way to get fans' minds off the recent bad news is for the Sun Devils rebuilding offense to push Idaho State around and for new quarterback Danny Sullivan to put up big numbers before yielding to true freshman backup Brock Osweiler in the third quarter.
10. Quarterbacks and offensive lines: Every Pac-10 team has preseason questions either at quarterback or on the offensive line. A few have questions with both. While one weekend won't provide complete answers, it should reveal which teams are going to be OK fairly soon and which teams need work. And who might be in big trouble. If the Pac-10 is going to thrive when the meat of the nonconference schedule hits during the next couple of weeks, it's going to need quarterbacks and O-lines to grow up quickly.

Pac-10 Media Day is this Thursday. Coach Carroll and Taylor Mays (seen above destroying a Penn State WR) will be representing USC. You can watch the entire press conference live and for free by clicking here.

Below is a complete schedule for the press conference along with which players will be representing other Pac-10 schools.

9:30 a.m. • Introduction
9:35 a.m. • Pac-10 Commissioner Larry Scott
9:45 a.m. • Paul Wulff/C Kenny Alfred - Washington State
10:00 a.m. • Steve Sarkisian/OLB Donald Butler - Washington
10:15 a.m. • Rick Neuheisel/MLB Reggie Carter - UCLA
10:30 a.m. • Jim Harbaugh/RB Toby Gerhart - Stanford
10:45 a.m. • Dennis Erickson/OLB Mike Nixon - Arizona State
11:00 a.m. • Break
11:10 a.m. • Mike Stoops/FS Cam Nelson - Arizona
11:25 a.m. • Jeff Tedford/TB Jahvid Best - California
11:40 a.m. • Mike Riley/OLB Keaton Kristick - Oregon State
11:55 a.m. • Chip Kelly/CB Walter Thurmond III - Oregon
12:10 p.m. • Pete Carroll/FS Taylor Mays - USC
12:25 p.m. • Pac-10 Commissioner Larry Scott

Pac-10 Football Media Day Announced; Fans Can Take Part [Pac-10.org]
Pac-10 Media Day Live Online [cbssports.com]

But the background of your Twitter feed? That’s not a scenic backdrop. It’s a wolf shirt stretched across my screen, dude.

The new face of Washington football: WOLF SHIRT.

This might really help them if they’re bent on recruiting 5 star recruits who frequent 4chan. (HT: The Doc.)

We spent a lot of time talking about quarterbacks this spring in the Pac-10, most particularly USC's quarterback competition -- did ya hear, Aaron Corp's No. 1 but this freshman Matt Barkley looks like the bees' knees!

The other general theme isn't new: After reviewing the tea leaves on the table, does any team have the karmic -- and talent -- potential to unseat USC from the top of the Pac-10?

The answer? Maybe.

What we learned. Or developed a hunch about.

1. Oregon State's quarterback situation is ... interesting: You have two starting quarterbacks who are seniors. One is going to sit. No other way to describe it. Lyle Moevao threw for 2,500 yards and 19 touchdowns last year but he sat out spring practices with a shoulder injury, which is exactly what happened to Sean Canfield last year before he lost his starting job. By the way, Canfield went 3-0 -- two starts -- subbing for Moevao in 2008. Though he struggled in the spring game with three interceptions, Canfield played well enough throughout that he probably owns a slight lead heading into the offseason.

2. USC's defense may not be as good as 2008, but it's probably as good as anyone else: The 2008 USC defense had more future NFL players on it than any other unit in the nation. And the 2009 version might not be any different, though there's clearly youth and inexperience to fret about from the Trojans' perspective. Still, start with perhaps the best secondary in the nation, led by safeties Taylor Mays and Josh Pinkard. Then consider the breakout spring of end Everson Griffen, who could win the Pac-10 sack title if he remains focused. Further, word is the three new linebackers might not match the NFL-ready standard of Rey Maualuga, Clay Matthews and Brian Cushing, but Malcolm Smith, Chris Galippo and Michael Morgan are faster. Toss in some impressive youngsters up front, and it's hard to imagine this crew not ranking among the nation's top 10 in just about every category.

3. The conference of ... running backs: The Pac-10 might feature the best collection of running backs in the nation. Five 1,000-yard rushers are schedule to return, including California's Jahvid Best, the conference's top Heisman Trophy candidate, and Oregon State's Jacquizz Rodgers, who won the conference's Offensive Player of the Year award as a true freshman. Toss in Oregon's LeGarrette Blount, a potential first-day NFL draft pick in 2010, and Stanford's Toby Gerhart and Arizona's Nic Grigsby, not to mention the six-deep stable of runners at USC, and the battle for first-team Pac-10 might be more arduous than All-American.

4. But can anyone block? Three teams that ran the ball well last year -- Arizona, Oregon and Oregon State -- lost three starting offensive linemen, including early-round NFL draft picks. Four others -- Arizona State, UCLA, Washington and Washington State -- were just lousy up front last fall. Even Stanford and California, which should be fairly stout, lost their best blockers from 2008. The conference's only sure thing up front is USC, which welcomes back its entire starting five, including All-American center Kristopher O'Dowd. Moreover, the teams that entered spring with questions on the line didn't get many answers three weeks later. O-line play might be the most critical issue facing the conference in 2009, even more so than at quarterback.

5. Sarkisian and Kelly bring new energy: Steve Sarkisian and Chip Kelly inherited completely different situations, but both made a mark by upping the intensity of practices. Sarkisian, of course, took over a lifeless program that Tyrone Willingham ran into the ground (uncharitable, but inarguable). He opened up practices and practically begged boosters and old Huskies greats to come visit. He also increased the tempo and energy level of practices -- heck, everything around the team -- which might do more than anything to get the Huskies a handful of wins next fall. Meanwhile, Kelly took over for one of the best coaches in the nation, Mike Bellotti, and brought a little East Coast volume to Ducks practices. He's not completely renovating the Ducks, who finished in the nation's top 10 last year, but he's going to add his own coat of paint -- which at Oregon, as you known, probably will be a fairly loud shade.

Concerns that athletic Washington quarterback Jake Locker won't be able to work within new head coach Steve Sarkisian's pro-style scheme might shortly evaporate.

Locker completed 16 of 18 passes for 200 yards and two touchdowns as the Huskies' starters buried the backups, 33-0, in the spring game.

Obviously, a team that went 0-12 last year lacks skilled depth, so Locker was exploiting overmatched players. But Locker's accuracy, a problem the previous two seasons, showed dramatic improvement throughout spring practices.

Running back Chris Polk also made a statement with 95 yards rushing on 12 carries. A marquee 2008 recruit, Polk began last season as the starter before getting hurt and redshirting.

And here's a potentially meaningful quote from linebacker Mason Foster, who had two sacks in the scrimmage, to the Seattle Times.

"Everybody is working three times as hard as before. Everybody wants to play for these coaches and they are coming out and competing every day, whether it's in the weight room or video games at the house. It's just a different mentality."

Lots of good quotes and notes here.

(He could room with his old pal Steve Sarkisian! Imagine the sitcom-esque shenanigans!)

ESPN.com’s Todd McShay addressed that speculation and picked a few other potential landing spots for Sanchez in a conference call with reporters:

“He could come off the board as early as Seattle at No. 4. Of all the players in this year’s class, right now he seems to be the hottest moving up. Teams are realizing as they meet with him and are around him more that he just has an infectious attitude. He loves the game. He’s a gym rat. He has leadership skills, and I think that’s playing well with a lot of teams that are spending personal time with him.

“Seattle at No. 4 is a strong possibility. The next spot is Jacksonville at eight if they’re willing to trade out. I think the Jets are a possibility to trade up. Washington, you never know with Dan Snyder.  He’s met with him twice personally.

“If he gets past No. 8, I’d say San Francisco (at No. 10). Whether the 49ers take him or trade that pick, I don’t see Sanchez getting out of the top 10 picks.”

More from the USC blog:

• USC football: Corp has support as leading man
• NFL draft: Maiava ‘could be better than all of them’
• USC football recruiting: WR Stills gets UCLA offer, awaits Trojans
• USC football: Mustain questions rep ‘interpretation’
• USC football: QB competition — rhetoric or reality?
• USC football poll: Is Corp the right call?
• USC football: Corp is No. 1, but ‘nothing’s permament’
• USC football: Bradford, Gable return to action
• USC football: Corp ‘excited’ about opportunity
• USC football: Aaron Corp named starting QB
• USC football recruiting: UCLA commit wavering toward USC?

Post from: USC

Carroll was less enthusiastic about Barkley after an interception in passing shells: "(Barkley) had a rough time in the 7-on-7 (pass drills).'' Pete consoled himself by smoking reporters in a foot race to his office, where he spent the rest of the day starting a ghost story blog with defensive coordinator Rocky Seto and Tweeting Jimmy Fallon about Will Ferrell.

• Instant impact. Neither Bryce Brown nor David Oku is on campus yet, but both of Tennessee's post-signing day recruiting coups are making their presence felt in the Vol backfield this spring: Lennon Creer, a highly touted recruit his own self two years ago, saw the writing on the wall and will "go in a different direction" rather than battle with the incoming freshmen. There may be more to the decision than potential playing time -- as Creer was one of the brighter spots in last year's backfield rotation at 5.3 yards per carry, he'd seem to have more than a fighting chance at at least maintaining his share of the work -- but until Brown and Oku arrive, UT will be alarmingly thin: Of the three backs remaining on the spring roster, only Montario Hardesty figures to get any significant carries in the fall.

In other notable transfer news: Jason Hannan, Rivals' top-ranked center recruit in 2007, has decided to leave Oklahoma for parts unknown; and UCLA quarterback Chris Forcier -- who, apparently lost in the Bruins' QB shuffle, announced he would transfer at the start of the week and was reportedly looking at Ball State and Purdue -- will return to UCLA, after all, and give wide receiver a try.

• Why hello, NRA. Would you like some cookies to go with your mounting rage? There must be more to the story than this, there must be. But for the time being, it appears backup Northwestern guard Jeff Radek was kicked off the team for possessing a BB gun. This isn't even a university issue -- it's ... municipal:

Evanston Police arrested Weinberg freshman Jeffrey W. Radek of Bobb Hall, 2305 Sheridan Road, on Monday for having a BB gun, authorities said.

The city of Evanston prohibits the possession of any "air rifle," which includes BB guns, air guns, spring guns and pellet guns, Evanston Police Department Cmdr. Tom Guenther said.

Somebody called police when they saw Radek with the gun, Guenther said.

For comment, we turn to Evanston's favorite son and Northwestern's most famous alum, standing by:

Oh. Never mind then.

Quickly ... Diminutive early enrollee Vincent Smith is popping eyes at Michigan practices. Another early enrollee, Tate Forcier, some more things. ... Getting to the bottom of the Nick Saban-Bobby Massie rumor carousel. ... Florida is ready for its championship rings, even ex-blue chip defensive tackle Omar Hunter, who needs a big spring after failing to step on the field last year. ... The battle to replace LeSean McCoy as Pitt's No. 1 tailback will carry over into the season. ... Why is Texas asking its right-footed punter to kick left-footed? ... Are South Carolina's offensive linemen afraid to block Eric Norwood? ... Oklahoma State is looking for dividends from Richetti Jones and Terrence Anderson, two seniors who haven't lived up to epectations. ... Barry Alvarez continues his tour of old haunts by stumping for his mentor, Bob Devaney. ... At least someone in Starkville bleeds maroon (though Mark Hudspeth might want to get that checked). ... Southern Miss will hold races for the student body at halftime of its spring game. ... Steve Sarkisian turned over his Twitter feed Thursday to an assistant for a sort of play-by-play of Washington's scrimmage, complete with awful pictures. ... Once again, Ron Zook is breaking news -- from the practice field? ... And do you love football?? Tim Brewster sure does!! I'm signing with the Gophers!!!!!

Much of the off-season news has focused on the departures of Mark Sanchez to the NFL and offensive coordinator Steve Sarkisian to Washington. However, it should not be overlooked that the entire offensive line will return for the 2009 season. Led by sixth year senior Jeff Byers the Trojans will have one of the best O-Lines in the country. This should make the transition at starting QB smoother for either Aaron Corp, Mitch Mustain or Matt Barkley.

Tennessee reported two secondary violations last month that occurred while hosting football recruits on official visits.

Nine prospects in Knoxville for an official visit on Jan. 16 participated in a mock press conference in Neyland Stadium’s media center after touring the stadium. Coaches asked the prospects questions while they were being filmed.

More evidence that, even when they seem fun or like a good way to keep you from sticking your foot in your mouth, fake press conferences are always a bad idea (unless you're selling beer, but that opens up a whole new can of regulatory worms). I'm serious about the video: Based on their actual press conferences, the fictional version is guaranteed gold, especially if Monte Kiffin got into it.

Also addressed: The smoke machine thing that hit both Kiffin and his old Southern Cal colleague, new Washington boss Steve Sarkisian, with slaps on the wrist for "simulating a game experience" with recruits on their respective campi last month? That's a Pete Carroll routine -- "Kiffin believed the use of a fog machine was permissible because he had seen it used while employed at another school. ... That was most likely Southern California." But the Trojans, they get away with everything.

(Speaking of Sarkisian, his new offensive coordinator, Jim Michalzik, is leaving Washington after less than two months on the job to take a position with Kiffin's old boss, Al Davis, and the Oakland Raiders; this comes less than two weeks after the Huskies' new receivers coach suddenly decided to return to Utah about a week into the job. No word on how much of Michalzik's $350,000 salary he'll keep for failing to make it to his first spring practice.)