EDSBS on How to Improve ESPN Gameday

As usual, we echo the majority of the sentiments expressed by the Everyday Should Be Saturday crew in their "improvements to college football's much-maligned, much-praised, and much-watched flagship preview show" post. But in particular, we'd like to formally second this motion:

Please do not prolong the withering career of Big and Rich another second.

The specialized lyrics may keep them on the ESPN payroll for another year, but the mayfly's life that is their career is done. We have lyrics for their final "special edition" song:

Well we're coming!
And we're shittaayyyyy!

If you wanna little (SPLASH! AIIGGHHHH!!! ROAAAARgggHHHH fip fip fip fip fip fip..aaiiighhn...)

That noise is a shipping container full of hungry, rabid wolverines being dropped on top of the C-list country duo just after being doused in chicken blood. If the budget doesn't allow for this, we'll understand. But after two years, it should be clear that no one wants any more ting in their ting tang, no matter how delightfully suggestive that may sound, since it would involve Big and Rich, whose appearance would serve as a powerful contraceptive to all but the most beer-soaked and undiscriminating brood mare.